Another six-word memoir: I don’t like my worlds colliding.
I recently posted the same exact six-word memoir, “Bloggers have rights; I didn’t know,” and a similar title to the blog I’m working on for my summer writing across the curriculum class. The students chose the original title for the blog (which I ADORED, but as Dylan sings, “Things Have Changed”)–now it’s something of a challenge and a statement: Write Across This _____.
We even picked the theme together: “Bueno.” I found a description of the design and loved it: “Bueno is a clean, minimalistic design which just oozes sophistication in both it’s typography & structure.” Whoever wrote that must also create names for lipstick and/or nail polish, such as, “O” or “I’m not really a waitress,” respectively (both of which I have owned).
Are you thinking what I’m thinking: “Bummer about the ‘it’s'”? I can’t help it even when I know I make errors all the time.
I’m not adding this blog to that blogroll or that blog to this blogroll. I don’t want my blogospheres to collide, not exactly, but I also want them just slightly linked–just this one time–just enough to feel some gravitational pull for a short while. Some small link would be okay. I think I’ll be doing some fun thinking over there during the term and want to have some connection with that person who I am, that teacher person I become who is different in every class, who learns something unexpected, who revels in teaching. My work on this blog certainly has influenced my work as a teacher in Fall 2010 and in Spring 2011–profoundly, deeply, madly. Seriously.
Perhaps that other blog will work some magic here.
I’m still teaching with the throttle wide open tearing down the highway like I always do with no real road map and only a good compass, but I have more to share than ever before, and more resources that I feel are genuinely useful to my students–and they are mostly open things like open educational resources (OER) that are so important to me now–like Writing Spaces. That makes traveling in the fast lane with Serendipity yelling in my ear, “faster, faster, pass that car, wheeee,” a little less worrisome to those in the car with me. I hope.
And thank goodness I feel like writing again. This blog brought me back, but also that other blog did, too. I have to write for my students in a writing across the curriculum class. Isn’t that what I should be doing? Plus the readings are really inspiring me. I lost the will to write this spring (don’t worry, it’s never permanent–it’s just about being a brat). I get so tired that I shut down sometimes. It’s not writer’s block; it’s writer’s rebellion. I just wouldn’t write. I didn’t want to write a word–so I didn’t. I made some presentations, fiddled around with video, and read a bunch of science fiction books. I took a few notes now and again in a meeting or at a couple of conferences (I really love to write when I am interested in what someone is saying–it helps me process and remember, too), but I couldn’t hardly breathe, it was such a busy term–so the thing that I made take a vacation was writing.
Now my writing rebellion is over and I’m back: thousands of words per week. And per usual, some of it dreck. Some fine moments, too, undoubtedly. If I tried, I could find a few hundred words out of the thousands I could really be proud of–but what matters most is the thinking, the connecting, yes, the collision. Damnit. The collision had to happen.
On WACATTACK@AUM I’m gathering my favorite sources together for both writing across the curriculum and open educational resources. It’s the perfect place to have as a repository for my learning and questing–I don’t see this site as useful for that. This is where I write and ramble and piddle around with ideas and thinking and maybe share some art now and again and do a lot of wondering and wandering–that blog is all about teaching and about harnessing information for a class, a purpose. But see the connections? Hard not to.
This morning when I realized I was out of coffee, I panicked and thought, okay, I’ll just have to write my way into the day. That’s what this blog is for. I started writing. (Then I ended up writing a bunch on that other blog and in our class Blackboard site, too–all I can say is “Bless you, Mrs. Kronnick, for making me want to type really really really fast in high school typing class.” Have I ever mentioned I won “The Bank of America Award for Excellence in Typing” my senior year in high school? I did, and that really says it all about me, doesn’t it? I killed in typing class. Typing class. Sweet heavens above. Typing.)
So all that is my meandering explanation of why I’d thought I’d link these two blogs in this most tenuous way, because here’s the other thing about linking things: I get nervous when my worlds collide. I have, most of my adult life, lived in discreet bubbles of existence: work, home, Idaho, California, Oregon, Texas, high school friends, first college friends, MA grad school friends, PhD grad school friends, aviation, K-12 literacy publishing, rhet/comp, literature. Rarely did these groups meet one another, and I sort of really liked that. I could dip into and out of the persona of whoever I needed to be whenever I was in a particular bubble. It kept my core from truly being revealed and allowed me some sense of peace when I was out of the various worlds.
I’m an ENFJ–that explains everything. I’ve taken the Myers-Briggs personality test three times, always the same. I own who I am: ENFJ. It makes so much sense. I’m also a empathic metamorph. I always knew it–I just didn’t have a name for it prior to Star Trek: Next Gen. What else explains me?
Oh wait, I’m also a Leo. I had my astrological chart “done” by my dad’s secretary when I was younger–sounded a lot like the ENFJ. Also my grandmother used to read my tea leaves and my palm–she was most helpful. And every day I spent with her, the first thing we did in the morning was read our astrological fortunes in the newspaper. I always knew what to expect. I went to a fortune teller when I was 16 who said I was going to marry a doctor, not be one, and as a grad student, a friend I knew used to “do” Tarot card readings for me. I should have been dead at 35, or a star in skin-care commercials. I’m the perfect comic foil for those who would try to pigeonhole me.
I think it’s going to be okay if my blogospheres collide. This moment was foretold. Surely. By someone. At sometime. Was it me? Or my tea leaves?
Do you remember the Seinfeld episode when George Costanza’s world’s collide? And you know what happens when worlds collide? Kapow. Kablewy. Kabam. Relationship George and Independent George knock heads. Independent George is being killed when George’s worlds collide. This horrifying melt-down and paranoia always cracks me up. I’m not sure if that’s one of those “too much information” comments, but ah well–there it is. I get the fear of the collision. I really get that.
But if I survived all the mumbo-jumbo of astrological signs and fortune telling–all those worlds colliding in predicting what would happen to me based on what? Guessing? I can surely survive this fender-bender in my blogosphere.
I worry too much. Just like a comic foil ENFJ Leo with Virgo rising.
I know. I’ll put on my “Paris In April” lipstick, paint my toenails with “Keys to My Karma,” and call this a fine ol’ day of writing. Indeed. I must say this about that: having my tongue in my cheek the whole time I was writing takes a lot of concentration and sort of wore me out. Indeed. But my toes look great.